Regaining Inspiration

Last semester, I promised myself to do better only to find out my subjects this current semester are 10 times harder than those during the previous one. Anyway, promise broken. I am really really really having a hard time in terms of academics right now. Putting extra-effort and setting more time for it would surely be the answer to my problem but then, I am afraid it’s going to give me a pretty hard time too because I am pretty much concern about having enough ‘me’ time which includes ‘friends’ time, ‘food’ time, ‘family’ time, ‘books’ time, and most especially my ‘sleep’ time. As you can see, I am not a very serious person which is bad, I guess because I am already a university student and my priorities should be well… priorities… real priorities… and I shall answer their demands first before anything else.

I’ve been very passive lately about those acads stuff which is really really really bad. My inspiration and perseverance went down to 5% which is really really really really low and scary as if it’s OK to fail any of my subjects and repeat them because there’s no point and it might be true that most people never learn to appreciate effort anyway. Though I am like this, I never received a failing mark… ever. So I don’t have any idea how would that feel. I’m not saying that I am surely going to fail. My friends say that I am being pessimistic and I should start looking at things at a different perspective.  Well, I am not pessimistic, I am just being realistic.

Then this week came. I like this week not because I had no exams (a week with no exam means that exams will be pouring like rain the following week) but maybe because of my Thursday, Friday, and Saturday.

Thursday. I’m not sure if I mentioned this to you before but Thursday is my least favorite day of the week since elementary, seriously. I hadn’t thought of that for a long time now which make me remember to ask my mom what day I was born and hopefully, it wasn’t a Thursday or else I’d probably think that I am a very unlucky person. Every week, all tasks deadlines is Thursday. Not to mention my first break every Thursday is at 4pm. Which means I am in class from 7:30am to 4pm and an hour break before my last class, which is math at 5pm. Anyway, this Thursday wasn’t anything unusual. Very busy that I needed to multitask every time during the day and I was tired so my seatmate in math and I decided to skip the class which most of classmates did too because Friday’s a holiday!

Thursday night and Friday. I ended the day at my friends’ friends dorm. They did something that I didn’t and I’m really glad I didn’t . Since I am already overusing ‘ I didn’t’, I also didn’t know we were going to stay there overnight. So ok, the truth is, we didn’t really stay there overnight because the place is too small for it to accommodate all six of us so Pat, Yosha and I decided to stay somewhere else. We were really confused and I partly saw the problem of running away from home. It just crossed my mind. Disclaimer, I never ran away nor thought of doing it but then, I know people who had tried it. Finding a place to stay even  just over the night is really hard. Seriously. It’s funny how we ended in a coffee shop and spotting an orgmate, ate Christine who was working on her acads stuff and was alone. So we accompanied her and Pat wasn’t in her ‘usual’ self because of some circumstances during that night that made her feel really sleepy and tired… and of course crappy at the same time. That was the highlight of the night, I must say, when she started lying down the couch, sleeping when she didn’t order anything from the shop and she can vaguely remember things after that and we kept telling her stories that the waiter talked to us about how my company should not sleep especially when lying on the couch with a leg raised. If Pat’s reading this post, she’s still going to wonder whether it’s true or not. Well then, IT’S STILL A MYSTERY AND ALWAYS WILL BE. YOU’LL NEVER NOW. Hi Pat, if you’re reading this.

Another fact about me is I can’t sleep in a still seating position. I can if I am in a moving vehicle. Another exception must be during lectures. Yes, I don’t know what’s with them but lectures make me feel really sleepy. I just waited until 5am and tried to play chess and dama and I’m not very good at both. Time passed and we were able to go back to the dorm pack things and go home. Still with Alyosha and Pat. It’s so nice of Ate Carla to offer us a ride to the bus terminal going to Manila since we were expecting heavy traffic around LB because it’s holiday.

We arrived home and my tatay was there who eventually left for Tagaytay with my uncle. Pat, Yosha and I slept for a short while. had late lunch and went off to an adventure. I toured them around National Museum. One of the places that I USED to like and is still very very familiar to me. I needed to pay 50 pesos.. which sucks, of course. I used to go there for free.

Moving on, the highlight of the day,was when we went to DLSU for Pat to pick up something. I don’t know. We were there for a very short time but I really really really like it.

Since I was the one who made our itinerary, I thought of going back to Rizal park after going to DLSU to make my college friends experience what I had enjoyed during high school. This might sound al little cliche and jejemonic but I enjoy lying down on the grass at Quirino grand stand. It was until my sister called and said that I should accompany her to MOA to watch RockRizal. I said ok and so my friends and I went straight from Taft to MOA. Very impromptu. I seldom reject invitations.

Sunsets here are usually 100x better than this. The afternoon was just too gloomy.

I lost my communication with my sister which made me really really pissed and disappointed and I hate having my friends witness how I act like a bitch when something that’s out of my expectation happens. I was hungry too and  I had little money but since I was mad, I made a decision to just have dinner at President which was way out of my plan because I AM almost broke.

Gladly, my sister had her phone charged somehwere and we had dinner together with my two friends. Then we sent Pat and Yosha to the station because they needed to attend on other things. We decided to wait for Raffy for around a COUPLE of hours… I don’t know if Raffy reads my blog but in case he does, hello!!! Tell me if you read this entry!

Raffy is a good friend of my sister who eventually became a good friend of mine too. He’s friends with my 10yr old brother too. He’s almost like a brother to me. We swim together sometimes and talk about stupid stuff. No, it’s me who likes to talk about stupid things and he’s of course, a lot more serious and dedicated than I am. We have different views and opinions but I can hardly notice that.  I always stand corrected. Maybe, he likes correcting me like he’s going to correct my grammar after reading this. No to mention he’s a lot smarter and wiser that I am. He doesn’t like it when people bring down themselves so I’d like to believe I’m smart too if I wasn’t just lazy. I am wise but I can still get a lot wiser.  Moving on, He’s super nice and girls like him!! (David G. is that you?!?!)  He doesn’t need to define conyo to me and doesn’t need to admit that he is. And, he’s super corny.

We watched RockRizal which was the sole purpose of going to this place and watch Gloc 9 perform. Raffy doesn’t know Gloc 9. I like Gloc 9 because he sings the truth. Though his music is not really my type, his words and lyrics are just the best. I’m not sure if my sister, Denden likes Gloc 9.

I wished to finish the concert but we needed to commute home.

Saturday. I woke up late because I was obviously tired and did’t get any sleep the night before. My nanay left for Cebu yesterday for my lola‘s death anniversary and Nico attended the International Bookfair. I was at home with my tatay  and ate Beth since Den has Saturday classes too. I stayed at home which is very unusual and watched UAAP cheerdance competion on TV!! My friends Rica and Sonette watched it live at Araneta I hope they enjoyed!

I am sure I haven’t mentioned this before. I always say that I go to school far from Manila but I never particularly said where. I go to UP Los Banos and I am studying Agricultural Biotechnology because my parents had this big illusion before of having me take up Molecular Biology and Biotechnology in UP Diliman. It’s unfortunate that I didn’t get accepted but it’s like blessing in disguise because I am having the time of my teenage life now.

Why am I telling you this??? The thing is, UP won! HOAAAARD! It’s not much of a big deal to me. It’s not that I am much proud but it’s because it made me remember that hey, I’m a UP student pala. I keep forgetting. There are stuff that you worked hard for and you value it for some time, and you forget.  So, how the hell and who was I to get tired and uninspired? UP fight!!!


6 thoughts on “Regaining Inspiration

  1. Life is short! No matter how well you do in your studies, we’re all going to die in the end, anyway. Have fun while you can. 😀 Too bad it was too gloomy to capture a beautiful sunset shot. I like you! Thanks for being radical, Danielle.

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